Does GOD Exist?

January 6th, 2007 by Quatrux

Many people do not believe in in God anymore, because religion became ‘Darwinism’, hanging on the evolution theory, thinking that it is based on science. So it really depends on what kind of person you are, as well as how you were raised, where you live etc.

I am not a religious person, I just like to stay neutral, even though I believe in some kind of a “creator”, but creator of what? Definitely not humans, because that in some way is proved by science.. but nevertheless, I think that now God is only our imagination, no one has prove he exists, we just believe in something we created our selfs, we even created “love” and “fate”.. we created numbers and mathematics, we created ..1010 1000 0001.. we agreed on what we created. So in some way, we are the “creators” but we, the creators do not know who created us, the galaxy, the universe.. so we believe in theories which were created by us.. Ever thought what animals think? In some way we are animals too, just that we are more intelligent than they, but sometimes I can argue about that.. Who is the God of a dog? Monkey? We definitely are not Gods to them, even though we deal with their fate. If we have one God, how the monotheism idea states it, so the same Jesus Christ father and Allah is their God? The dog has to learn from the Bible or Koran? Any wise men would say this is bullshit – the God we imagine doesn’t exist and I hope never will exist or over wise we will kill him, due to we are humans, it is very easy to foresee our actions.

In some way, I believe that the word God stands for something we don’t know, for example in the ancient Greece, we didn’t know why lightning appeared, so we created a God of lightning, it is logical, we don’t know what is the last number in the mathematics, so we have an object -8 +8 just the letter 8 is horizontal, not vertical. We don’t know yet, but everything is changing with time, we know more and more and maybe we one day will reach a such knowledge that we will reach the God and our mission will be over, maybe.. We have a wide imagination and can think of a lot of things.. People used to believe that the World is flat, so we have different theories what kind of form the universe is, but maybe the future people will be laughing from us, because they will know it. Learning and knowing the History is good for our present and even the Future. Religion needed to show the path of good to the people, to show an example how to life, to create some kind of an order, to give an aim in your life, to create something incredible – utopia, but it failed.. Religion just brought bad and evil among people.. All the history is based on wars, most of the wars are religious, most of the bad things are hidden with the name of God. If this idea is right, then when God disappears in our society, we, animals will only fight and start wars for women and money – something useful, due to it is better than fighting for something in our imagination, for things which does not exist, such as God, who didn’t give anything useful to the people and the world, everything was done by Man, with his own hands and head and who created the universe? It evolved itself, but somebody needed to “turn it on”.. Big Bang? We can’t fully explain it, there are lots of data about this, the universe center, how everything is moving from it even Today, but that is astronomy, so read about it yourself, because there is no God.. Wait, there is God over there, because everything we don’t know is created by God.

Doing something against the laws and humanity by the name of God? It is stupid, laws aren’t perfect, because we created them, politicians are more stupid than most of us, it is just their job to write and publish laws, that order would exist, because the 10 laws of God isn’t enough in our society today. Besides, did God say that if you die for me or kill for me I will be glad? We the stupid humans thought of it, in the war the troops were the same religion, they both prayed for him, asked for help, so how does the God decide whom to help to? What is the difference to God between a Christian and a Muslim? when our knowledge will become superior, we will become Gods, but that won’t happen soon, because currently there are more chances we will kill our selfs and become obsolete – it is easier to destroy than build, we can think a lot, but the most easiest thing to say is God will decide what to do with us and when you die you will see that only dust or bones will be left from you, you’ll be history and only it will remember you.

On this subject no one is right, no one is false, it is a lifestyle, if you believe it or not, I can create my own religion and can find people which will believe it, in some way the Church, Christians is a sect having the most members, same for any other religion. But people start to believe in God when something bad happens, like you are near death, why everyone is so atheistic, but when you are in a critical condition or almost dead, you start to pray to God? You start to believe in God? Maybe it is because you’re afraid of death and don’t want to burn in Hell, because you know you have made a lot of evil in your life.. Humans are not perfect and I think there is nothing perfect, moreover philosophy can’t answer anything, it just gives more questions, every individual should have their own philosophy about what is truth and what is the point of life, just today these questions are said to be stupid and childish, because we have bigger importance for surviving and getting money and God is getting somewhere behind us.. Telling the truth new technologies appear so fast that it is moving faster than evolution, to adopt for so much information we need a much “better” brain, I mean our brain cells should work faster, but you can’t do it in 10 or 100 years. Moreover, the society is getting more stupid, the most important thing today is money and your job, do the job and watch TV, I won’t talk about how they advertise sex these days, it seems that it is the only thing we need from our life’s – Man has become the most disgusting living thing on earth, because he depart the 10 laws of God. To make a conclusion, a man should believe even to something which in reality does not exist, he needs to fool himself and face all the untruth, but of course must seek for his objectives with God or without God, thats the difference – he does not exist, he does not do anything.. All is you, your character, your mood and health and health depends on your disposition, if you feel dead, than you are dead..

Man is still changing because of the evolution, eventually the body parts we don’t need will disappear with time.. Human brain does not function on full power, we don’t really need it to function so well, but everything will change, due to the 21 century will be a biology century – we will change ourself, we will change into a better for us environment – that means we will go against God and will move from his word even further. I won’t see the result of this, but my grand kids children will see it.. Everything changed very fast, if Ceaser saw XIX century France, he wouldn’t be surprised, but if Napoleon saw the end of XX century – he would be very surprised.. Moreover, if J. Bush saw XXII century, he would be even more surprised, but maybe not, due to J. Bush saw lots of fantasy movies about space like Star Wars and Startrek and in those time not a lot of people read Jules Verne, no one believed. So we must admit that totally new times have come and traditional life style is not suitable for us, we have to forget the body guard which was created in ancient times – God, thinking logically we can’t expect anything from him, but if the Church would officially say this, God would really disappear and that I wouldn’t really want to happen, because a Man fooling himself and believing in something what does not exist really helps himself, relaxes, aren’t so afraid of death, because he knows that God will take care of him after death. A man feels much better after a confession to a priest, even thought Today you can confess to Police, Doctors, Psychologists and others, just their words aren’t blessed. I respect people who believe, who does not force to believe others, its very nice to believe in something? doesn’t it? Maybe it is one of the most nicest things we have.. I believe too, but I believe differently – I believe that I still don’t know a lot.

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February 11th, 2006 by Quatrux

In school we had a party, 100 days until the end of school.. I, as a school leaver think that it was really pathetic, I was ashamed that I was in 12 form and that our class have made such a pathetic acting.. so much time and energy was put into it.. good that I did not do anything for it, that is why I could laugh really, really loud.. even though it was so pathetic, I really liked it due to this fact. I don’t remember when I was laughing so much.. Almost everything was miserable, the comments, 2 hours of comments on everything, like in the old cartoons “I will shoot you with my laser gun into your breast” Oh my God, I got a headache from the comments, the comments almost never were said in the right place.. The time periods between different things were long, to long and it was so unprofessional that I wanted to see my literature teacher bread party :D

They created some video and could not show it through a video player, they were using Windows Media Player and some other pirated software on the laptop, but could not show it, because the codecs weren’t set normally, that gave me a big laugh, they did not know what to do and started talking bullshit, reminds me of Bill Gates, when on one presentation Windows froze and needed a Reboot :D Pathetic, just pathetic, a tragedy, unsuccessful comedy, if they wanted that people would laugh out of them, they succeeded ;)

The 11 form acting shown to us, was a little boring, but fun and really much more organised and professional, I liked that, oh and we had a guest who helped for the pathetic acting, a dancer, she really knows how to move her hips, it was fun to watch something like that rather when see it on TV.

All to all, I criticised it, but now people could start saying to me: “try to do something like this yourself and you will know how hard it is” I know that myself, I am not stupid, but still it was PATHETIC. That is one of the reasons, I don’t volunteer anywhere, just sometimes where I know that I can do it easy and more to the perfect side, when I start doing something, I usually move to the perfect side, but I usually do not succeed and do not do anything at all to continue, just get angry and start blaming everyone around me, because of my mistakes.. That is me, I can’t help it, everything I want to do fails and everything I don’t want to do succeeds ;)

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and so it Happened..

February 10th, 2006 by Quatrux

..and so it happened.. at Last.. What to do now ? How to continue when you don’t want anything at all ? How to survive and get over all the shit ? Runaway and get a new life ? I wish that could be so easy.. Turn your emotions off and don’t care about anything except yourself, that is a good choice.. I need to start loving myself again, because now I think that I am a big idiot and I hate myself, I need to find a new mask in my closet and hide under it. I don’t see anything better, when you care about others, you start to forget yourself, then you care about yourself, you become bad, I like bad.. Thats it! Fuck all the world and all the problems, I don’t care, I’ll do what is the best for me. No help, no nothing, just me, myself and my.

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my Dreams

January 14th, 2006 by Quatrux

For a while I started to have a period of dreams, I never liked to read what do dreams mean, but thought to write it and understand myself what problems do I have. I used to rarely dream, only the end parts when waking up, so that means I used to sleep well, because people who does not dream and remember only black screen, mean were in a deep sleep and their body has relaxed and has rested. So I started to dream a lot for some time now, I don’t try to remember the dreams, it is better to forget them, but when I try to do it in the morning I understand something has happened, I started to feel a lot of pain in my dreams. For example, recently I was closing the balcony windows and some cats has jumped in, I kicked their butts, but one was offensive and grabbed into my arm, I tried to through him out, but the pain created to my arm by his teeth was enormous, I woke up and felt the pain, even though no one was near me, but eventually in three seconds period it vanished. It was only one example from a few.. I was kicked in a dream, I jumped and felt onto the ground and what scares me mostly, some weeks ago I dreamed how I died in a car accident, I got squashed by a car and felt the pain, it hurt so much that I woke and could not say a word, my every muscle was pulled, but after three seconds I understood it was a dream, I would not call it a nightmare though, I was enjoying it when looking with my eyes I got overridden by the car and saw myself from the over corner for about 1 second. More than a month ago, I dreamed that I am flying, the feeling is really great, but then I understood I am dreaming and could not control it, I understood people can’t fly and started to fall down, I thought this is the end, I will die and I hit the ground, again the enormous pain, but this time I did not wake up, feeling the pain I stood up and said I need help, I am dieing, I could not move, it seemed that I am walking in one place, so I started to panic, I punched myself into my head and woke up.

I think I have a lot of deep psychological problems, but I did not care about it if not the recent two days dreaming, it was like a “god like” dreams, I controlled myself in those dreams, I understood I am dreaming, it was like another world, which I created myself, you can feel like god there. I used to dream those kind of dreams, but never the effect last longer than 10 seconds. It lasted for about 5 minutes, I almost fully controlled it, I imagined that under the other corner there is my friend and when I looked, it really was there.. a bit different with a strange haircut, but that is not the point. There is a WAR inside me and I don’t know how to stop it, it makes me mad, I can’t be myself, I don’t care if I loose it or win it, I want it to stop, even though I always wanted to dream “god like” dreams, it is not so fun when you can’t wake up, in those kind of dreams you’re not yourself, you are stronger or weaker, I remember fought with a guy and won, I remember I got easily beaten up and felt no strength to kick back, my muscles was “out of order”.

Almost forgot to add the main thing, that in the “godlike” dream I was talking, with a friend, I was saying to him that did he knew if this is a dream and it is not real, he said what did I mean and did not believe me, I asked him “how do you know me ? tell something about me” and got a reply that “I know you, what is with you ?” and no more, he was created by my brain, a character.. I still did want to prove that this was a dream and cut of my hand, nothing happened, I did not feel anything, when I turned back he was already gone, I still walked and after some seconds in other room I saw my hand back.. Of course, it is very hard to think there, when you feel like you will now wake up, I just said no, sleep to continue, but the next “episode” changed.. I think you now can imagine something.. :S

For a year now, it is much harder for me to understand there is my reality, there is my dreams and there is my own made up stuff, I just can’t control it anymore, sometimes I think that some episodes from my dreams happened in reality, I start to really believe my made up stories, I think I got lost and know I don’t know the path to get back, I can’t find the door to return, I have started to live in a “fantasy” world which I create for myself, but I hate it, I want it to stop and all the stress vanish somewhere else, I feel like I am crazy, I know that I am smart, but I can’t show it to others I got used to be treated as an idiot and speak as an idiot. I wish I could stop being an idiot and look forward, but I just forget about it, I am pissed of of being alone.

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January 12th, 2006 by Quatrux

Firstly I will explain what desire is. Desire is not a an urge for sex, alcohol, power, money or similar. You’ll get it when you will remember the phrase “godlike desire”. Desire – it is a lure and lure is a challenge , so desire is a challenge for sex, alcohol, power and etc. I just thought of an old good saying “know your self” even though it sounds fuzzily. How to know ? What exactly to know ? and the main part – why ?

As a matter of fact, what will you get by knowing ? for example, of course the understanding of your weakness ? Why do we need that knowledge, will it give us happiness ? And how will you need to know ? by practice or by thinking ? a little of experience is more superior than tons of thoughts.
Is it possible by thinking a lot strengthen your ability for something you don’t have practice yet ? or maybe you just need to try it ? (You remember what a challenge is ?) hundred times of thinking how you will feel in an unknown situation for you, we just go down in that kind of situation.
So that means that we only can use our thinking when we are already mature, so if we explain mature as gained experience, that is the desire, probation, so what then, we will give up for the desire ?
It all just sucks to seat hours in the chats on the internet, of course it is a desire, but how many hours do you need to spend there to know your self ? a year ? a month ? a day ? how many alcohol you need to drink, that you would understand an easy thing, like: with whom you will be drinking, you will still drink in loneliness. A tank ? a bucket ? a box ? a bottle of beer ? how much you need to “fuck” that you would understand that searching for a perfect ideal is pointless ? hundred ? thirty ? or just “masturbate” ?
Whatever you say, I don’t care. In my opinion the satisfied one is not the one who ate all, but the one who ate substantially. And for preconception I can suggest to “temper your self”.
Doesn’t all our problems start when we over try ? You can laugh from a young virgin guy the same as from a chronic clap lecher. If you didn’t fell it practically – shut up; if you practiced for the process and not for the knowledge – shut up at all. On the other hand, been there, done that, did it – gained experience, got desire ? when you gave up for the lure. As I remember “Nothing is to much” as said our ancestry..
And whats in the end ? it is the question of the point of living. I mean why brothers and sisters to live ? I think we need to live until the moment comes, when death becomes a free choice and not a sad need. I will explain: to live until the time you will say for your self “I answered all my questions and further it is silence”. The point of life is to understand and know your self, it means to answer all your questions. To know is to test, try, desire and understand..

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January 11th, 2006 by Quatrux

Everyone needs to take decisions, even if you do not like them, you need to choose something, everyone isn’t perfect and usually a lot of people make bad decisions, but that is the point, to learn from them, to learn from your mistakes, to get experience in different situations and learn, learn all your life until your death comes, maybe tomorrow or maybe after 50 years, it is very easy to die, it is very hard to live and if you don’t have a point in your life or do not know what you want from it you might think of suicide very often and stuff like that. Why lead a healthy lifestyle if you will still die ? why do we need to do something at all ? everyone can think of stupid questions. I think that it is better to ask less, because you will still not get your answers, or might think of 10 answers which are different from each other. Why have a headache from that ? I think answering questions which still does not have an answer is really great, but it leads you to being mad or you might start acting crazy and even surprising to your self.. this is normal, as I said there is nothing prefect in our life, as a matter of fact there is a lot of terrible things happening, the line of bad and good which has to be about 50/50 isn’t like that, the bad is wining and that is why we all are going to die, unless the humans will start making more good than bad.. but humans are choosing easier things usually, because it is much easier to do bad rather than good. why do we usually see bad things from a person or a thing ? not the good, of course there are people who are looking only into good, but they are blind and pretend to live, even though they might be happier. I think life sucks and I hate it, but I am trying to enjoy it, I would not like to die, even though I am not afraid of death. The best life period in my life has already finished, the childhood. Why do we want to grow up so fast ? being an adult sucks, so much problems you just can’t solve, the only feature being a grown up is that you can enjoy sexual life.. a lot of people living for a longer time and thinking say that love is the main thing in love, but what can you love if everything around is so terrible ? yea love really matters, even if you love a tree or an animal, it’s still love. The thing which does not matter in life is money and wealth, but we just can do without it, so it is a need to have money, we created it so lets use it, lets use everything we create, lets destroy what others created, nothing has a sense until you will create it and use it for your self.

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Faustas Heading

December 5th, 2005 by Quatrux

As a Dog, Faustas had a lot to show in all his life and I think if I am in the mood I could be talking and talking about his life, in some way a dog is like your child, your best friend, as your brother and maybe even as your parent, but it could be an enemy too, if you’re crazy you can make love with it, but if you do, please get out of here and go jump from a building with more than 5 floors, then you will be a happy person, dead, but happy!

So seeing your dogs life from the time he had been born by his mother is quite fun, because humans are smarter than dogs, it is much harder to fool us for them, but still wouldn’t a dog be a perfect child ? just think about it, it does not know how to speak, it does not cost so much to upkeep it, you teach a dog to live, he learns from his fellow dogs too, a dog has no problems with smoking, alcohol and drugs, but eventually it has other problems, like eating other dogs shit, but some humans do it too, I hope they will be smart and jump from a building too. One minus about having a child like a dog, is that he will die faster than you, because his life is much shorter, so you would feel a lot of pain and pain is bad for you, pain is good for you, pain is bad for you. Think of other things, a dog won’t never put you into a pension like most of the grown up kids, you will always be the boss and you don’t need to be afraid when your child will become stronger and will be able to beat you physically.

So in conclusion, dog is one of the best things in our polluted and nasty world where you almost can’t find any truth, but who cares, what is better than a dog it is your own real child, you just have much more problems with it. But living without pain, suffering and problems and even more problems isn’t fun, even if sometimes you think that it would be better to have no problems.. A dog has a lot of problems too, like having apeshit or all the life staying virgin and not feeling the pleasures given by live.

Article taken from » Faustas homepage

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